The episode begins with a kid we don’t know riding through the desert on his dirt bike. The kid jumps off his bike to pick up a tarantula and I die. For comfort I stare at my KitchenAid mixer and wait for Mr. Betty to tell me it’s safe to look back at the TV. I’m not going to elaborate on my arachnophobia. Shudder. Moving on.
Walt pays Hank a visit at work under the guise of talking about his marriage. When he breaks down and cries, Hank gets uncomfortable and quickly flees, giving Walt a chance to bug his office. It pays off and we later find out that the DEA placed the tracking devices on the barrels of methylamine. This scarce ingredient continues to be a problem for them, but Lydia’s seemingly endless sources save her from Mike’s wrath once again. I swear though, he’s itching to kill her.
Lydia tells the guys about a train that passes through that carries a buttload of their precious methylamine. Rather than dealing with mere barrels of the stuff, this would be enough to fill a swimming pool. But the stakes are higher and the likely hood of getting caught is too risky for Mike. Walt, of course, wants to do it. The two fight. Then Jesse’s all like, Yo, bitch, let’s compromise. Seriously, when did Jesse become the voice of reason?
Skyler is holding her ground and making the kids stay with Hank and Marie. Junior is very angry and wants answers, which his parents won’t give him. The baby charms Hank and I think this might make for a good kidnap spinoff. (Note to AMC: I’m offering to write Hank and Holly on the Run for a modest salary and a meeting with Jon Hamm. Call me.)
So they get the tools together and recruit a couple guys, including Todd the friendly exterminator, to help out.
In order to not get caught they are only going to steal ten thousand gallons from the train, replacing it with the equivalent volume of water. Walt gets a little science-geeky talking about chemical volume verses water and I can’t help but think he’s still the same science teacher underneath the monster he’s become.
In a carefully-timed plan of stopping the train, unhooking giant bolts and attaching hoses, they pull off the theft. It’s a close call that requires Jesse laying on the tracks as the train rushes over him, and Todd jumping from the speeding train to the ground. They take a moment to congratulate each other and revel in the glow of a successful heist. And then they see Tarantula Boy standing on the other side of the tracks. As they stare in shock, he gives a little wave. Todd waves back then quickly shoots him. What. The. HELL?!