I always look forward to the VMAs. But my enthusiasm was dampened by the choice of Kevin Hart as host. Man, that dude is just not funny. He was the worst part of the VMAs last year, so this choice of host is baffling. Was Russell Brand not available? Billy Crystal? ANYONE ELSE?! Whatever. Don’t make this mistake next year MTV…or else.
Rihanna opened the show and danced around like a modern snake charmer with about 30 female backup dancers. I was amazed when she moved her performance to the middle of the crowd…I believe that’s a first in VMA history. She looked beautiful with short hair and it was a strong opening act. I approve.
The night immediately took a turn for the worse when Kevin Hart came out like the POTUD (President of the United Douchebags) with a secret security team of little people. Boooooooo.
Pink performed in ill-adviced sparkle panties and suspenders, but who cares? There are giant dancing lips spinning around on the stage.
Frank Ocean performed a low-key and off-key stripped down number. I’m not sure what the stage was supposed to look like. Oh, a space swamp on fire? Nailed it.
When Nicki Minaj won for best female video her outfit did not disappoint. For someone whose job it is to, you know, rap (which is essentially speaking, right?) she could barely manage a coherent thought. Don’t get me wrong, I like Nicki. But practice a couple sentences before you get on stage, girl.
Aging Green Day put on one of the strongest performances of the night. They always pull it out, and you’d never know Billy Joe Armstrong was in the hospital two days prior.
The most interesting moments of the night were subtle. The cast of Twilight (minus Kristen Stewart) previewed the final installment of the series. Rob Pattinson looked a little worse for the wear in my opinion. Maybe he needs to go into the woods to feed. And Wiz Khalifa announced that he and Amber Rose have a baby on the way. Take that, Kanye.
Taylor Swift closed out the show with a bubble gum anthem that felt less country than kiddie. I can’t hate on her. She’s too innocent and cute.
So that’s all we get for this year. Definitely not my favorite year for Video Music Awards. I know, I know. What do I expect? It’s MTV. Well I expect more.